Let's Play: Top Secret Alien-Related Government Tracking Device, or Decorative Object?

Here's how neurodivergent brains work. This is an extremely scientific explanation, so bear with me while I use some highly technical medical terms.

When I threw out my back, years ago, I had to endure a barrage of chiropractor visits. During my first visit, they took an x-ray. After taking the x-ray, the chiropractor then took me to a consultation room to show me the x-ray, and started saying things like "L-4 vertebra thingie whats-it blah blah" and "rotator fuckwaddery whoopsie boopsies"  as my mind proceeded to ignore the word soup pouring out of his piehole, because on the x-ray, I instantly noticed the outline of a bizarre circular object right in the middle of my belly.

He was just totally ignoring that thing. Talking about it like it wasn't the most alarming part of the entire x-ray. Probably because he was in on it.

Let me back up. 

Being adopted, an X-Files fan and a neurodivergent creates a Venn diagram intersection the likes of which Jackson Pollack couldn't even begin to splatter on a canvas. 

I've been aware that I was adopted for as long as I can remember. I often wondered about my mysterious origins - it should be noted that this back injury happened long before I discovered my birth family - and the part of my brain that had spent my formative years watching Mulder and Scully get to the bottom of all kinds of alien and supernatural and in-bred hillbilly shenanigans decided to take the wheel on that day, as I stared at the perfectly ominous metal sphere thing that was inexplicably inside of me, per the x-ray.

So my first thought, upon seeing this circular object, was:

"I FUCKING KNEW IT. I'm part of a secret government experiment. I was created in a petri dish in a top secret lab somewhere. They took ALIEN DNA and created this test group of half-human, half-alien children, and released us out into the world to secretly observe us. That's probably a monitoring and tracking device. Is this chiropractor not talking about it because he's in on the conspiracy OR is it invisible to anyone who isn't part alien or a government agent assigned to this half-alien kid project?"

In about 30 seconds, I concluded it must surely be the latter. I wondered if the government agent assigned to monitor me was outside right now, in the back of a windowless van, surrounded by surveillance equipment, saying to himself, "SHIT. You had one job, Steve - make sure she never finds out that she's part alien."

My second thought, at about the 60 second mark, as I stared harder at that circular object at the center of my belly?

"Oh GODDAMN IT. That's my navel ring. It's not from the government. It's from that time my friend took me to that piercing place at that strip mall in Vegas. Boy was I drunk."

I was legit so fucking heartbroken to realize that I was probably just a regular ol' human. Why? Because humans are stupid. I mean, I'd enjoyed a solid minute there of feeling massively superior to humans. I think I even quietly chortled at one point. Because how sad to be one of them.

Internally, I'd been gloating. And now I had to come crashing back down to earth, tragically not by way of spaceship, to continue to reside amidst all the normie human bullshit.

 It was a fun 60 second thrill ride while it lasted.